When I'm calling the register at the start of class, the students often either grunt or answer in Chinese whenever they hear a name vaguely similar to the way they think, often erroneously, that their English name sounds. This usually results in four or five boys grunting back at me the first time call 'Brian', even though they have spelt their names for me as Brean, Brain, Bryant and Bran.
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Thank you Roo for the postcard, which soon became a classroom prop and discussion piece when my lesson plan came up five minutes short today. My students are sorry that they're keeping me here over Christmas, and suggested that perhaps I ought to fly back for the weekend...
Also thanks for for Spectator and Private Eye although if anyone's thinking of sending intelligent reading material, The Economist and Guardian wallcharts would be most appreciated. Big week this week, as on Friday and Saturday I'm cramming in most of the make-up classes that will allow me to finish early enough to get a five-week holiday in spring. It's only 30 hours, but foolishly I've decided to do some Christmassy stuff - which means listening to Mariah Carey's All I Want For Christmas with five groups, for the best part of ten hours. Oh dear, X In most of... No. In all my classes, the back bench is occupied by three or four sleeping heads. The heads are connected to shoulders by a neck, with an arm either side and part of a torso underneath, the rest of it being obscured by the desk onto which these body parts collapse the instant any kind of teaching begins nearby.
Or just passed anyway!
I think half the college is back on military training in the morning - the past few days, I've been woken up at 6am by the sound of (what I presume to be) hundreds of marching, shouting students starting the days off with a casual bit of formation drills in the main square. Canadian teacher Bryan reckons that's it for Anna and me, and there'll be nothing we can do about it. They've decided, and we're going to have to live with the consequences. It's going to be hard, being 'favourites' of the staff, I'm not sure if it's safe for me to go to the office any more. Walking in there, I know that if Lin rushes over and says "I need to tell you something," the subtext of whatever follows will be 'you're going to have to perform for an audience - observers, cameras, teachers, whoever - very soon, with little or no preparation'. In fact, none of the teachers at last night's meeting had been given any warning that we were expected to review each others' teaching styles and share experiences and knowledge, with a view to enriching the students' learning experience. Honestly, I'm most interested in any worksheets and ideas for games going spare. A teacher who's been here nearly five years went first, speaking convincingly about the need to create a good rapport with the students. During this, Lin appeared over my left shoulder, whispering " I need to ask you something. Will you give a speak?" This was too Chinese a request to be a joke. "I've taught seven classes, Lin. Ever." "I observe your class, you are very good. I think the other teachers will like it." I thought that the other teachers would like to go back to their apartments, to relax after a day's work, and especially like not to have to spend two hours discussing the merits of singing The Beatles in class. But there was no way out of it. This being my five minute warning, I started writing a stream of thoughts while listening to the experienced teacher. Student expectations. Write them. Rapport. Stay in room at break. Close the gap. Let them get closer to you. Informal interactions. Friends. Go outside. Play basketball instead of class. Play in the snow. Are you shitting me? Correct them. No, don't. Develop their fluency. Five teachers having spoken, with some 35 years experience between them, it's my turn. I can't remember exactly what I said but starting off with some self-deprecation, an obvious gag about the student lecturing to the teachers and the honest admission that I don't think I want to be friends with my students (and don't believe they need to be friends with me) but am relying on coffee and being friendly, has won me - and Anna, who made a great speech too - some new friends... teacher friends, they're allowed. Oh, and the British accent, that's getting us a long way too. All the way to being 'favourites' in fact, and into these situations. X I suppose I should've seen it coming when Lin, who works in the foreign teachers' office, promised that the camera crew sent to film me teach (after having filmed Anna's class), to capture on tape my 'communication with students', would stay at the back of the class, be unobtrusive, I would hardly notice they were there.
So there's me, enthusiastically reading a dialogue in which one character has forgotten their warm coat when it begins to snow, arms aloft as Pat cries "Oh, no!", the realisation setting in that she's been caught coatless in cold weather. There's also a shoulder-mounted camera so close to my face, pointing down my throat, that the 'communication with students' being filmed is being recorded at source, at my vocal chords. In hindsight, the camera guy and sound techy were never going to stay at the back of the room. I see that now. How could they resist getting closer to the apparently crazy foreigner on the podium? Especially when he's seemingly nearing a breakdown as Julie - Pat's friend- discovers she has left one glove at the laundrette and it's a long walk to the car. "I know!" Pat shouts, the snow that isn't falling in the classroom but is in the illustration perhaps drowning out her voice. The class think Pat has had a life-changing, world-changing idea. The cameraman nearly trips over his cables as he spins to capture every HD-detail of the students' reactions to what is about to come. "We'll take a taxi." Well, I'm sure they can use computer graphics or a voiceover to jazz up the last bit. My second scene will doubtless be played just before the credits begin to roll (or probably after). Take one was perfect, totally off the cuff, but apparently I wasn't using my hands to speak enough. I had thought about it but two things stopped me: 1. my arms were tired from pointing to the Heaven's in a 'Why, God, why?' pose when Pat and Julie couldn't find a cab; and 2. because everything from my neck down was certainly out of shot. Needless to say, Take Two won't be earning me any auditions, least of all because nobody who speaks English will ever see the film. Except you, if I can get a copy. X Hello,
I taught one of my new classes today. 500 new freshers started yesterday, having arrived late: the harvest has only just finished and they've been working with their families in the fields and factories. I was worried that they were going to be 'challenged' (I'm learning teachers' euphemisms), yet they were surprisingly good. I felt like quite the celebrity, having to do a photo call at the end. I caught one girl filming the class - her first English class, what an occasion - on her phone. I say 'caught', but it was no bad thing, as I set them off on an activity and proceeded to show hobbies flashcards into her camera - she can use it to revise later on. Speaking of being watched, I had two observers in class yesterday - Lin, who works in the office, and a teacher I don't know from the Dean's office. Things went well: I had already taught that lesson plan twice that morning, the students were awake (which sometimes helps, sometimes doesn't), and I tweaked things so that there were fewer aimless games and more grammar. I was a bit nerous afterwards as, when I left the room after the class, the students and two observers stayed behind, presumably so they could tell Lin and the teacher from the Dean's office about this maniac who jumps around at the front of the class twice a week, speaking in tongues and making them repeat 'zzzz' and 'tssss' and 'shhhhh'... Bryan (Canadian) reminded me that they write a report (not good), you never see it (gets worse) it doesn't affect your pay (what's the point then?), they can't fire you (keep going) and you don't get any feedback, students' opinions or constructive advice (ah). I got feedback. Sort of. At least I think it was feedback. This morning I came into the office and there was a tall Chinese gentleman standing in the middle of the room. "You're... teaching.... style... is... excellent!" he said, apparently recognising me. He looked like the observer from my class. Normally, I wear my glasses in class so I can see the kids at the back playing on their phones/ sleeping/ smoking. Yesterday, I didn't, finding some comfort in being short-sighted and therefore unable to see the two observers at the back of the room. The smokers got a free ride, but I felt more relaxed not being able to see the observers making notes, and got on with things as normal. "Thank you," I replied, "Did you enjoy the class?" A blank look. "You, you were in my class yesterday." I tried again, switching to TEFL English. Another blank look. Actually he looked as if an invisible butterfly had just landed on his nose, and he slightly strained to focus on its wings through his spectacles. Really, he looked entirely surprised to find himself in front of me, talking to a white man, as if he had no recollection of beginning a conversation with me at all. I retired early, turning back to the water cooler (total misnomer - you can have warm water, or hot water, or go without water) knowing that I was about to ask 30 students who speak more English than the man sent to assess my teaching capabilities to repeat 'zzzz', 'tssss' and 'shhhh' for two hours. X Hi,
That went so much better than I thought it would! I'm not saying it was the best class ever taught, nor are they all the best students ever, but I'd been told that freshers are typically shy, don't participate and their English is very poor. I only had one class today, and was more than quite surprised when all the students were on time (early, in fact), smiling and outgoing. They didn't have English names, which would've been helpful, so I've asked them for homework to choose one before their next class (Sunday - we have classes this weekend to make up lessons missed this holiday) otherwise I'll give them names of Chelsea players. We only did basic things, focussed on introducing yourself to somebody new - which was easy to explain in context - and they all seemed to know it already. This meant that we flew through everything I had prepared, so I spun out some activities that meant they had to get up and move around the class for just a little bit longer than was probably necessary. I think the main task this year is going to be building their confidence and giving them practice, as they've already learnt most of the grammar at High School or with Chinese teachers who teach them English - a bizarre arrangement, they have English classes with a Chinese teachers. When I asked someone (Canadian) why not just have us teach them English twice as much, he told me that half our job is being here for show and we're worth paying for 20hrs/week, but that 40 is an expensive decoration. So class was good and I think I made a good, if a bit overly energetic, impression. Tomorrow I'll have three classes, one of which is after lunch, with different students, so will simply repeat today's lesson plan three more times. Then on Sunday I can move on to something more complex, for the second round of lessons. A class is two sets of 50-minutes, with a ten minute break in the middle, 25-30 students to a class. The boys sit on one side, the girls on the other - when I asked them to mingle for one "getting to know each other" activity and gave them ten minutes to collect names and students' hobbies, they sat and giggled for the first three minutes that they would have to talk to each other and shake hands. The girls giggle too when I ask them questions. All in all, feeling positive. Anna's second lesson today was observed by a suit, which I could live without, but if there is one they'll be introducing themselves to everyone else and drilling out any mistakes. "My name is... I am 50 years old... I live in Zhengzhou." In other news, the office have opened a Bank of China account for my wages and Anna and I have made a noticeboard in the foyer of our apartment building for the foreign teachers to post notices if anyone's planning trips into town/ the football/ karaoke/ market/ further afield. All's well, speak soon xx Hello,
Wow, it's busy here! I finally managed to buy tickets to Shanghai for National Holiday. It took four trips in total, even taking student translators with me, because you can apparently only buy tickets ten days in advance for the train in China - no early bird prices to be had here - and the demand for travel next week is so high. But we've got tickets now for a sleeper train leaving ZZ on 30th September in the evening, arriving in Shanghai after lunch the next day. These were, supposedly, the last available tickets for either the thirtieth or the first! It's a sleeper train, so we'll have bunks, but the description "Hard Sleeper" sounds ominous... Last night we went to see Inception, in English with Chinese subtitles at what seems to be the only English-language showing of any film in the city this month. When the lights came on after the film, I was half-surprised to find myself in China, having zoned the Mandarin subtitles out for two hours. We still don't have internet in the apartment block, so I'm spending a lot of time in the International Studies office over the road to prepare lessons, drink coffee and check emails. It's actually quite convenient as I get more done here than in our lounge. The staff are also really friendly, and enjoy teaching us short Chinese phrases. They've named me Gao Sen Sen, which roughly translates as Tall (or Big) Forest. The symbol for 'sen' looks like three trees arranged in a triangle. Photo of my attempt at writing it to follow shortly. There is also an English Club - second- and third-year students with a good level of English who help the foreign teachers around the city (buying train tickets, negotiating in markets, getting buses etc.) in exchange for extra help with their English. My first lesson is looming. I'm fairly well prepared, I think, I hope... x |
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